Elementary

I’m Not Butt Mom

The question my kids asked the most was “But, Mom, can I have this?” My answer was “I’m not Butt Mom.” The full reply was, “If we all got what we wanted, I’d be on a beach in Fiji right now. And don’t call me Butt Mom.” They never asked where Fiji was. I didn’t …

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How Was School Today?

Garry never told me anything about school. Tommy told me a little bit. Kay would start her stories before her foot hit the pavement as she stepped off the school bus. Each kid was so different. My firstborn, Garry, is now a man of few words. He was also a child of few words. Every …

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Garage Sale Business School

Who knew the best school was right in their grandparents’ driveway? The World’s Largest Garage Sale is in my hometown and has been going on for decades. We still sell stuff from the driveway where my parents lived for 40 years. Mom set up a card table to keep the kids busy. They sold brownies …

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Grocery Store Rules

The produce section of the grocery store used to give me nightmares. I rushed through it like an octopus. I grabbed vegetables while swatting Tommy’s hands away from plucking that one apple that might topple the pile of fruit. At the same time, I needed a third hand to readjust Kay’s pacifier or pass her …

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Kay wearing sunglasses looking cool

Grownup Growing Up

When I said I love you, my daughter replied, “Yeah, and I have a yellow car.” She said this at age 3, yet it was still a typical response throughout most of her childhood. My children pulled away from me when they went through middle school. I knew it was a normal part of growing …

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